Overwhelming mental anguish is universal, at a point in life we all have experienced grief or heartbreak by loss or disappointment.
36% of youths had psychic issue due to emotional setback, just because we are absolutely powerless to the loss of our loved ones.
In the year 2008, on the 16th of August during my visit to Lekki beach, I stumbled on some youths, it happened that we shared the same table at the beach and so I innocuously got involved in their discussion.
One of them said “I'm going on a revenge mission”, not knowing what they were discussing before I intruded, I said “Revenge” and the guy replied me with a yes. I asked, what for? He said young man, I just broke up with my babe, I found out she was cheating on me and so I made up my mind to move on by dating many girls and in the long run disappoint them.
I was startled by this young guy's speech, that isn’t the solution here. He was actually doing the right thing by hanging out with his friends to forget the past but such a cruel decision is never the solution…
Many things cause heartbreak, I'm going to discuss few…
(1) Purpose and career: I want to focus on my purpose, your purpose isn’t in line with mine, I want to pursue my career and I don’t think am up for this relationship right now.
(2) Job: Am a banker and s/he is a teacher…. I earn more than S/he does, S/he isn’t too good for me.
(3) Academic Status: Am a graduate and s/he is not a literate, how am i going to introduce him/her to my colleagues?
(4) My parent will never agree: I was just 15 when my father sat me down and said you must not bring home a girl from this tribe…..
(5) Sex differences : I'm not a sex machine, s/he wants sex and I'm not up for this… sex shouldn’t be the bedrock of any relationship.
There are many more but I just took time to list out few of them.
Questions like, Why did he leave me? I’m the only one for him.
How dare she hurt me, after all I’ve done for her…
Questions like this will never stop crossing your mind, so how does one get on the mend after a heartbreak?
It all starts with a decision, one of the things that makes loss so difficult is a refusal to let go. You try your best to let go and focus on the brightness of the new day ahead.
Syfurian; does it mean that it no longer hurts? That you no longer love the person? That what you once shared is no longer important.
It can mean those things, but it doesn’t have to.
The point of getting over it, is that you move on with your life by enhancing the time you have with other loved ones successfully without that person.
Nothing makes the empty feeling disappear and no one in the world will be able to instantly take away your tears or mend the wounds that have been inflicted upon you, those sleepless nights spent thinking of the person you cared so deeply for. Time, among other things will help.
This hardening experience will change the way you perceive and interact with other people for the better.
Enduring this heartbreak will only make you a stronger person. You will be able to start discerning whom you should let in and who can’t stay..
Truly you are absolutely powerless to the loss, but there will be a better tomorrow. The sun will shine again. Every morning, the rest of your life begins, but it’s up to you to let go of the past and seize the new day. Time will help you heal, but heartbreak itself will help you grow…